Excursions avatar

Excursions

Essays

I am breaking....

Truly i am. Work is really not effort-worth. I am unable to do the tasks worth effort. Those interest me are not around me. Mind seems to be blogged with unknown demons. Eyes occupied by elephantine tiredness. It seems each and every body part is trying to move in altogether different direction. Trying to tear me apart. Each help offered just seems helpless. I want to run away. I want to hide from every minutest thing. Wish i could do that so simply. Wish i could hide that simply...

A Commute through Orkut Communities...

Here is another slippery weekend sliding beneath my feet. As i sit acting idle, with feeling rather unsuccessful with my attempts to follow "Operation Afraid", i start scanning my social appearance at Orkut. (P.S. I did succeed in beating one dreaded task. Successfully washed the clothes, a task no less than a feat. Though the fear of uncompleteness did keep me away from taking a bath and shaving. You see victory ask for persistent efforts :P) And along my stroll, I again dashed into a place i find the most meaningless. The Communities.

I always thought that it should be wrong to say that i completely hate them. The fact that i myself have joined around 50 communities should signify that. But then it was today i thought to drill into my communities' choice. And then rose the truth. All the communities i have joined can largely be divided into following categories:
  • Ones i joined as a newbie, similar to a kiddie thrown into a toy shop picking random toys
  • Ones which i was forced to join with an ultimatum of sort "Join now" ('or you will be hanged alive' was always silent :P)
  • Ones wherein you just feel great to be part of. It hardly matters how much sense it makes in you joining them
And it was then i realized that communities are indeed quite a boring and meaningless places to be in. More meaningless than boring. Include one more of ones which i created and I guess we have the categories generic enough to include the whole 'orkut'ers. First, it hardly has any sensible activity going on. (One can surely not mark people proving themselves to be superior by posting last or naming there predecessor or playing jokers as sensible.) Secondly, thanks to the first point and the second and third category, it hardly reflects what the person's interest really are. So a weirdo playing a "Rate the person above you" game in C++ community places him straight into the third category just in for senseless fun.

Moreover mostly are the occasions wherein the common interest projected itself is quite confusing. There are majority just to display one's liking for blah blah singer, writer, director, actor, books, sports-persons, nations, places and every such namable entity. For each one mentioned above there is an anti-community of haters. Each one of these have various levels of followers: country wise, state wise, city wise, university wise and the digging just goes on. Then there are those which say they exists for common purpose like "spreading happiness", "cutting sorrows", "making healthy", "shit happens: you are not alone" and bhah blah. And finally those which are quite weird which do make you raise your eyebrows. Few to mention "I hate orkut" (wouldn't it be a good idea to group such interesting people in Facebook) or "Announce new orkut communities" (Community with a goal to promote other community?? how innovative) or "Absurd Communities" or "I hate orkut communities" (need i say anything??). How i wished to be innovative enough to come up with something so fascinating and new. No wonder each community has atleast a single copy with equal number of members.

Anyways whatever i say, they do exists and exists with thunderous activities. I know i do have missed to crown many others which indeed need a mention. But then considering the vastness of this community world, i dare you try that out!

Security and Privacy!!!

Just found this amazing image depicting how security and privacy are inter-related in todays web-world. I guess its pretty simple.

"You won your security. But they own your privacy"
Update: Apologies to all those who indeed saw quite a supposedly "private" image here. All thanks to the dynamic image whose contents were "weirdly" played with. Now that was quite an experience, something worth learning from.

Operation 'Not Afraid'!!!

Throughout my student and professional life, i have been named and renamed hundreds and thousands of times. If i was made dada, manu etc at home, each one followed that up by gawande, amit, amith (southernized), wasudeo (!!! thats my father's name. Isn't that ironic that it was called when i wanted it to be the least, while distributing the checked answer sheets), strato, gaws and recently to few more. I felt like a bot in quake3 arena getting named for each player. Yeah!! as if this wasn't enuf i myself tagged myself with "the great", "the warrior", "gaws", "gamer" and simply "the player" in gaming arena. But there was the one that kept following me and i dreaded the most. "Phattu" (meaning "the fearful". Quite interesting isn't it? I feared the name itself). Though i felt it wasn't fare enough, I feared the things every normal one did. And if someone didn't i always felt he should be called the fearfree (physo??? :P).

Anyways today it was just by chance that i thought why not untie this tag from myself. But the first step was to list down the things i feel i fear the most in recent time. Because the countless times i was afraid is the past now and past hardly counts. So here goes the list of my recent 'fearmakers':

1) Weekends: Yep. These dudes come with a promise to let me complete all my jobs i have been postponing to meet just to slide under my feet with a lighting speed keeping me awake every sunday night. And thats the night i go to sleep with mostly zilch completed. Few uncompleted jobs include random internet surfs, itemized jobs like meeting, following up with XYZ, completing uncompleted work over the weekdays, do some shopping, paying bills, calling someone and and... Uff the list really goes on. Few which always top the list and remain unbeaten include washing clothes and shaving. Its all because i keep fearing each one of them, i hardly take a bath on sunday. You see i hardly find any time. Facing the monday morning with every planned thing untouched shivers me up.
2) News reports boasting someone: It may seem its fully faltu to fear something so stupid. But boss you should watch news channels catching random roaming people and making them comment on blah blah attaining blah feat. And then follow the unending murmurs: "East or West blah blah is best", "Blah blah is great", "we love u blah blah", "i feel in todays world .... hjhsdjsa.... sjdhsaj" (a sudden break from news reporter finally breaks his non-abating tempo). I fear heavily that one day it would be me who would end up on either side of the conversation: i mean either boasting someone or holding mic (Nah me getting boasted over a news channel seems hardly probable. Though the speed with which news channels are turning insane, the possibility cannot be negated. And believe me, that would be no less fearful)
3) Reality shows and SMS: I don't know if the show producers really know that but sending an SMS here at our place does get charged. But lemme be clear. No horror serial/movie isn't as horrifying as these shows. I really worry if i keep on watching the reality shows, time's not far when i would unknowingly type "&*&* A" or "LEAD #" and send that to 56789. Lines are open from saturday 10.... Arggghhh You see the side-effect. It just sticks and stinks inside. And even unknowingly you start blabbering the rules. Now thats the fear.
4) Google Homepage: Seemingly harmless bot, this is the most dreadful thing among the lot. I myself feel am addicted to this dude now. After atleast every 1 hour of joblessness, I feel to face this faceless creature. I fear he would one day take over my mind one day and and spread his crawler bots to digg out the information hidden inside. The phrase (and widely used "About me" statement in social profiles) "My mind is an open book" would literally turn into "My mind is an open searchable entity. Just google it dude". Its really scary.

I guess i should stop for now. Its the Sunday night, have just seen an episode of reality show, been targeted by the boasting news reports recently and just now ebbed myself my visiting google.com. So before I really get bogged down by fear, let me reveal the plan. Plan is i am going to not fear any of these things. Simple solutions is not watch television, no web surfing (surfing without googling??? Just can't imagine) and yep no work postponement. I know that's pretty 'new year resolutions'ish type of statements, but a start need to be made. Once i regain my control over these things, i will move to few other fearmakers. Till then good night. Its me signing off for tonight. Will meet next Sunday same time .. Argghhhh need to sleep. Fearmakers on their way!!!

Update:As if the "Google" fear i talked about earlier wasn't enough, there struck this video which intensified this fearmakers effect on my "blogged" mind. Thats quite creepy.



Blogged with Flock

Laugh Monkey Laugh...

"Give me a strip of laughter dose please."

I know i do blabber pretty brainless sometimes. But then thats what comes to my mind whenever they yell "Laughter is the best medicine". So if thats the case, why pretend that its not sold in the medical stores? It is indeed sold by a lot of agents, with political leaders leading the race followed by the so called "Blah-Blah Rights Protection" buffs. Anyways thats not the purpose of this post's existence (Hmmm ... Interesting!!). Why this post lie here has its own insight.

Along my stroll down the web's spider lane, I came across an article "10 Benefits of Laughter, and How to Use It". Triggered my weird thoughts. As each point scanned under my eyes, my mind blogged through the idiotic wanderings. "Why"'s and "What if"'s started cracking under my skull. And the only way to abate that was to pen it down. So here goes the autopsy....

Imagine a comment from a person something like "Buddy, i finally reduced the level of cortisol, epinephrine, adrenaline and dopamine man. Been long since i laughed." I mean may be thats true, but is there any need to know that? How does that matter which '-ol' or '-ine' i reduce. Really makes me think why do these dudes have to break down something simple like "Stress level" to all these '-ine's. Put it simple yaar. "Laughter reduces stress level" and one doesn't require any scientist to tell him that. Its instinctive.

Plus they say laughter is a great workout. Okie, point taken. So from tomorrow onwards i will go to gym and break into a huge roar of laughter. Being highly contagious as they say, it won't take long to spread all through the company. Now come the two threads from Butterfly effect which my life can take.
  • It instills the positive mind frame in all the employees. And similarly all the city dwellers and finally to the whole country and then comes world. I win Noble prize for spreading happiness all around.
  • Employees feel a complete physical release of tensions and all deadlines are forgotten. The behaviour spreads to the country and i am charged with contempt. I find the scientist who did this research and kill him. I am hanged.
Moreover a research suggests that optimistic (where's the connection with laughter dude?) people live healthy and longer. Now thats obvious. An optimist would never say "I have got cancer buddy". Rather he would insist its a kind of a roller ball running round his stomach providing him guffaws. So never would you see him saying he is ill. Thats it. He is healthier for the world.

Anyways fun apart, one point does hit the bull's eye. A smile costs absolutely nothing. So why not spread it on the face. I just wear it on and live on. Without really caring if it does benefit me or not. But one thing is for sure. It does spread some kind of freshness to one's mind and to the face. So cut the crap buddy and spread the smile. It does make difference!!!

An Apple a day...

We Rule!!! Another instant thought! Throughout my life, from a tender age when i was railing on my knees, I have never been a "Frutomaniac". I mean i have never been an idiotic fruits lover. When kiddies around me were busy drooling over all sorts of fruits, i was busy enjoying fats. Parents kept forcing me to push fruits in myself and i kept on running away making faces and crying like hell. And as always, the childish weeping bomb won over the parental force. And as i grew up, i was installed with an image for each fruit i was made to eat, forcibly. Follows the list (Don't expect this list to be exhaustive. If you do, stop eating fruits and go visit a doctor)
  • Custard Apple: This is the one who i met earliest. And as i visualize this guy, up stands the Tom Hanks from "Forrest Gump". Poor Chap who everybody just rips apart and relish. Hence goes my sympathies with this rusty.
  • Orange: This guy stands as one of the protagonists from any of the "American Pie" series. I mean he is all time dressed up just to get undressed. Capable of bring tears rolling down even with its peels. And a simple aim in life; lose his virginity (remember how you undress an orange with your thumb :P)
  • Pomegranate: Here come another rusty guy. But he is by no means the sympathy earning one. I mean, to start with, its no child's play to name and start relishing him. Even if you if do open him up, he starts poking his seeds in your tooth cavities; once his choco mate has played its part.
  • Watermelon: The chubby fat dumb a**. His black seeds depicting his face with pimples all over. As expected he has to be juicy. And its enough to drivel along your arms over your shirt. I never remember me mating him with my shirt over.
  • Mango: The dude in the gang. Luck has always favored this guy unlike the poor custard apple. He is smart, he is rich, smells and tastes heaven. In short has all the qualities that can draw any female counter part in the fruit fraternity crazy. The news is he is dating Banana these days, you know that stripper round the corner. Yep the same fair chick ;)
  • Apple: And finally comes the most opportune guy among them all. Reasons unknown, this brat runs along every corner right from the mommy's kitchen (Apple pie, which is mostly without any 'apple'ish touch) to the Doc's clinic (An Apple a day ... the real interpretation follows). I mean he does hardly anything to earn fame. But sometimes its just divine providence and hence he earned the blog title too.
Thats just a small list of chaps who have significant thrust over my memory. There are many others like the ugly fat jackfruit or the sexy berries or the fearful grapes or the sleepy papaya. But then these don't stand enough ground.

And before I end the post, lemme just clarify one thing. There is more as to why Apple earned the title here than just his fortune. For last few days, i have been made to eat apple daily claiming that "An apple a day keeps the doctor away". Its been just two weeks or so, and lemme assure you one thing. An apple a day does have guts enough to keep anyone away. Doc was just the poor guy who fell into the trap!!!

Blogged with Flock

Blank....

Blank... Thats how i have been for almost a week now. Truly speaking work apart, life's really following a pattern. 'Pattern' itself is trying to poke its head out of the blogged mind, but will somehow prevent it from doing so for a bit.

This post of mine is more of a "puch" to my blog. It has been throwing the same faces at me for more than a week now. It looked totally rusted, highly demanding a post. So thought lemme push down what i have been doing for a while. So the pattern goes something like this...
  • Come to office : Is it really a step?? Though the efforts required does make it one.
  • Check mails : Doesn't matter even if i did it just before i left for office. Thats how work dawns at me
  • Remain updated with my social contacts : Name sounds big. In simple words, i look at my un-updated profile again searching for new updates. Even a look at lame updates from friends would do
  • Get coffee : Dude, it draws one fresh. Makes me totally ready for work
  • Start Working and keep working : Works always there boss. But all work can make one a turtle head in an office. So simultaneous tasks include keeping an eye on notifications from Outlook, Gtalk, feed readers, communicator, fellow workers and "hope they were my fellow workers" types. By the way, a basic click continues. Check mails and social networks!!!
  • Lunch : Have to take it boss. Can't jump over it. I can give my 100% only when my tummy stays 100%.
  • Scribble about everything : "Why just aloo/paneer?" "Need a small nap yaar!!" "Boss i shouldn't have filled my tummy 100%. It really makes work difficult!!! [paradox???]" "Oh wow.. Man I never get a chance to praise beauty. Is it me who choices the wrong places to fall in or its just my luck that throws me in??? [Men will be men ;)]" And when i do think this is getting too out of work context, only the scribble context change "Tomcat sucks big time man!!!" "Eclipse slows like damn dude" "Uhhh my system needs a dose buddy!!" And as this continues ...
  • Get Coffee : One has to get fed up. Nothing works in noon. Coffee has to make me fresh
  • Start Working and keep working : Work again. And stays the simultaneous threads. Just that an another thread with look at the clock gets added. And as EOD arrives...
  • Check mails and Social Networks : I do it only twice. Once in the morning and again in the evening. Anyways no one mails. So why waste time checking mails. (An inner thought cries "Uhh still no mails.. no scraps")
  • Leave Office: I have a common statement to end my day daily "Today's was the worst day mate. Nothing worked yaar!!!" Scribbling continues....
And as i end this post, an instant thought strikes. Does any software engineer spends a routine even an inch different than this one? Out comes the answer, obviously yes. Afterall every software engineer has new scribbles to scribble and new notification to look at. Also not everyone drinks coffee ....

[PS: Though the above mentioned steps seem bulky, but they hardly take 5 % of my working time. Reasons are simple. I hardly get any checkable mails or replyable scraps or readable feeds. Moreover work does succeed to pull me in]

By the way, follows a nice video on juggling. It does provide another work synchronized thread, a look at "Buffering ..."



When is a kilogram that is no longer a kilogram still a kilogram?

Another random crawl through the web brought me to this interesting fact. It seems it really is a big riddle to find a solution for. I mean look at the riddle. It does ring a bell for an ardent Hindi movie buff. (won't call it Bollywood!!! Though am not sure why, but as they say some things are better unexplained. May be a bit Patriotic feeling, which pops up every now and then).

A famous dialog from the movie “Chupke Chupke” starring Dharmendra and Amitabh. “Gende Ka Ful Ful Ho kar bhi ful kyun nahi hain?” starts guffawing into the ear.

By the way here goes the main story:

"A riddle: When is a kilogram that is no longer a kilogram still a kilogram?

Answer: When the chunk of metal that serves as the official international standard for the kilogram, under triple lock-and-key in France since 1889, inexplicably sheds a little weight.Very little, though. The cylinder of platinum and iridium, sitting under three concentric glass bells like a metallic round of goat’s cheese, is 50 micrograms lighter than the average of several dozen copies."

Weighty mystery: kilo standard sheds 50 micrograms - ABC News (Australian Broadcasting Corporation)